so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Be still, my beating vagina.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
