Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
