you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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