Can Purell be used as lube?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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