If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
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