it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
