i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
