Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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