She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
