this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
