so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
