got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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