The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Why are your pants in the freezer?