Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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