do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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