I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
