I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
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