This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
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Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
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I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....