the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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