and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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