the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
