If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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