Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
