your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I am full of burrito and curiosity
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
