the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
