every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
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If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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