It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
