Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he shaved USA in his pubs
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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