ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
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