he wants to bone in the snuggie
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
