Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize
