I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
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