You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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