Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
