when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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