Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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