I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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