I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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