so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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