The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
