We won't sleep together?
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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