Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize
