What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
