I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Then you guys just all showered together...?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
