the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
