I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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