You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize