i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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