i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
