drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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