I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
