Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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