xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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